mom sums it up

At times I feel like 2015 was the worst of my life--largely focussing on the diagnosis of my mom's brain cancer, but that might be unfair. The year was also filled with fun.

Amara thrived in first grade at her brand new school. She is continuing to amaze me, become a leader, and trying new things like a new dance studio, basketball and girl scouts.

Cora is doing great at GCCC, making lots of new friends and enjoying dance and tumbling and being a ham.

I loved our annual Hilton Head trip, and Disney in November was a blast.

We got a few more things done on the house, we acquired our 2nd pup, Mr. Oliver (Ollie) in September, and despite my brief hospital stay and scare for blood clots, it doesn't sound "so bad," does it?

Still. I lost a lot of my mom this year. Who she was. She will never drive, or complain about my house, or surprise me with dinner in the crock pot, or buy me goofy birthday gifts. I would give anything to come home and see her on the mower again at my house but I never will.

We have a big year ahead of us--all of us, a lot of fight and tears i'm sure, so for now I will chose to be thankful for the blessings of 2015 and pray for the future as well.

New Year's eve at home

This year, with everything going on, we opted to not do anything outlandish. I bought lots of snap pops, noise makers, etc. and we made appetizers and watched tv.

The kids stayed up as late as they could hang. They ate popsicles, and we watched some of the NYE shows on TV.

I had to take mom to radiation both on NYE and NY Day, so I didn't want to plan too much too early, and the kids slept in a little for me anyway, so it was all ok.

Board games were fun, laughs, all very therapeutic and needed.

daddy checks in...

girls night with Saphira

In the middle of all the holiday craziness, the girls ended up missing Saphira's birthday party, which was at Kierstin's new 5 Starr salon in GC.

She so graciously offered to "make it up" to them and do a personal spa night for them, did pedi's and make up--the whole deal!

They went back to her place to spend the night, and of course Amara had no problem--but Cora called to come home at about 10.

Amara stayed the next day and they went to Cracker Barrell even and she overstayed her welcome and finally came home.

It was SO sweet of the Bailey fam to help me with the girls for a night and give us all a break--we are so lucky!

grandma Jahn's treatments begin

Radiation didn't used to mean much to me. It felt SCI FI or i'm not really sure what i thought it was, but on the day she started, I got to see it up close and personal.

The setting was nice enough, go in, strapped to a table, music, 7 minutes, and grab a snack and go but of course it was much more than that. 29 rounds of lasers aimed into her brain, to try and stop or slow this Glio--and she could understand "some" of what was happening...

but getting up every morning to get to the James unit at 9, rain, sleet, or snow, sometimes in FREEZING weather, wasn't fun. She was a trooper, never complained, often laughed. I'd get her a mocha on the way home, or chik-fil-a if it was later in the morning.

We also reconnected with Frankie from a restaurant in town, Talitas, and she visited there a few times on the days Linda and Barb took her to treatments (Thursdays).

She saw the same team every morning, M-F and even going on holidays. Cindy and Penny pitched in too to help. Dad mostly insisted on going, but sometimes he'd hang back and give himself a break.

We know it's not a cure, but there were lots of prayers for slowing and healing regardless.

celebrating christmas with the young fam

Just after Christmas, we got together with the Young side of the family. They all came to our house, which was super nice for us and let us be nearer if dad needed us.

The kids all exchanged gifts and mostly played, and since it was early the adults just enjoyed coffee and cookies and enjoyed the entertainment.

It's cute for Amara to be the "oldest cousin" and watch the younger kids watch after her--I can see how they all look up to her, though i'm not sure if she sees it yet.

They all raced around with baby strollers, and Elsa's and played play doh and crafts and then when the younger ones got crabby, they all took off. It was a good mix of low key and family at home, and just the right amount of time and gifts for everyone to be happy in the end.

christmas at the jahns

Kind of sad when Christmas is warm enough to wear a tank top, but that's exactly what happened. The girls were excited to see the boys at the Jahns, regardless of presents.

We were all able to play outside, not sledding of course, but basketball and outdoor toys. 

The girls stayed in jammies and we kept things low-key for mom. Charlotte stopped by too, so that was fun. We all worked on oragami owl style charm necklaces together--so not entirely crafting (which grandma can't stand) but something fun to do and keep anyway. 

It was a really nice day and we enjoyed having grandma home, we didn't know if it would happen!

Dad gave her the book from her birthday party that susie made for her and she loved it, others gave her photos too--so all in all it was a lot of love for grandma. 

christmas morning

Christmas morning came fast for me! I was up wrapping--quite behind from spending most of my time at the hospital, but Eric helped and we made it happen. Mom and dad came over to see presents with the girls, like always, and my tired little ladies were glad santa visited. 

Stockings are always one of the best parts for me and are fun, so we love going through all the little trinkets.

Next up presents and more presents :) 

christmas eve church

Christmas eve was just 2 days after we brought mom home this year from Dodd Hall, and she wanted to be sure we got to church--so we made sure that happened. We all got dolled up, and it wasn't even cold!

Mom was able to enjoy the music and light of the church service, even if she did think it was long. 

The girls looked absolutely stunning in their dresses, angels if I ever saw any. 

And we all cuddled and clung to each other in the service, very aware of how lucky we are to have each other especially right now. 

gingerbread houses

We love putting together gingerbread houses and i think the girls would do them year round if we let them. There are always new kits out, and this year we decided to do one that had tiny miniature houses, instead of one larger house. 

Amara was really gaining control of her pasty bag more and more, i was proud!

Cora loved making the house pretty, lots of decorations all over. I think it's one of the most important aspects of the holiday season to slow down and have some creative time with the kids too :)

Callie's turning 7

oh Callie! she is just the best little friend Amara has from Darbydale. They were fast friends in Ms. Bice' class in kindergarden and have stayed friends even though they aren't in the same class this year. 

She invited Amara to her party at WoB in GC and we were thrilled to go and hang out. Her entire family is so sweet and kind, we love any excuse to spend time with them and this was no different. Kids and smiles everywhere!

Amara spent time practicing in the basketball jump as well as the slides, but mostly the two just ran around playing tag or chase--it was really sweet watching them.

making grandma Harmon's cutouts

Making and decorating Grandma Harmon's cut outs is a Christmas tradition for sure. After all the visits, cookie day, shopping, etc. we try to do these as close to Christmas as possible so that we can enjoy them over the time we have together. 

The girls are getting quite familiar and skilled with rolling out the dough. Amara measures the thickness and checks it meticulously before she makes her shapes. 

Cora may not have the patience yet, but she tries. and certainly doesn't give up which is the most important! I love watching them dig for their favorite cutters--houses, candy canes, reindeer, bells, whatever their little hearts desire. 

We make up a bunch of frosting and color maybe 5-6 batches. The girls dig out their sprinkles and jimmies and daddy loves the decorating part too. The kitchen looks like a bomb went off, but getting to sneak a cookie for the week or so that follows is the best. 

Usually they go with a solid color and sprinkles, but no rules in decorating. Sometimes they rest and take breaks, others they dig in and ice till they are done--no matter what it's an all day treat for me, and i love the time together with the tradition. 

santa visits!!

Santa came to visit this year and it was special as always! The girls were in their comfy clothes already when Santa pulled in and surprised us all. Mom had just been released from Dodd hall earlier in the day, literally, so we got her over to our house quickly so she could be part of one of her favorite events of the Christmas season. 

Dennis sang and told stories with the girls like he always does--of course. And as he'd been following mom's posts online, he knew what she'd been through and how rough a season we had been having. It was nice to see a friendly kind face and although things weren't as elaborate as they had been in past years, it was great to still keep our tradition and keep some magic in the season. 

Cora's ladybug christmas party

I was so thrilled when the Ladybug christmas party rolled around this year. Even though things are crazy with mom, it was good to check out and enjoy some silly 4 yr olds for a morning regardless. Cora finally likes being in her class and has some sweet friends, so I love spending time with them. 

Her pal Westin can be a bit dramatic, but wherever you find one of them, you'll find the other. 

Ms. Emily has really gone out of her way to make Cora feel welcome this school year. Cora loves her so much and takes every opportunity to show her or tell her--I love when kids really love their teachers!

The kids enjoyed sugary snacks together and crafts and then did a cute "J" for Jesus/ Stocking craft with a nice poem/ verse on it. I got to help Cora a little but she mostly wanted to do it herself :)

At the end of the party the kids crashed for a movie--snoopy maybe...her friend with the glasses is Reese, one of her BF's in the class. She's the sweetest little girl, a twin, and a great influence for her too.

I felt so lucky to be there for the party and celebrating the holiday with my girl and her pals. 

cookie day '15

This year was probably one of the most special and memorable cookies days for me ever, which was saying a lot. As mom was up at Dodd hall rehabilitating, I was allowed to bring her "home" on a day pass and to my house to be around for Cookie Day--which mom is always a part of. 

Thankfully lots and lots of friends came down, to bake, laugh and spend time with mom and just have a warm, loving environment for her. it was the best. 

Ily snuggled with mom in her chair, the girls all brought mom sample cookies and Amara and Cora were as involved as ever, it was great. 

Kortney surprised us all with her new hot look--she looks amazing!

And all the gals dug right in, making the old favorite recipes as well as some new yummy ones. 

Megan and Loretta both came too which was just awesome since they are the co-founders with me too :)

We got a group shot--it's never everyone who comes, people are in and out so it's just impossible to catch everyone, but at least we have a nice group shot with mom in the middle. 

Annie took some great pics that day too--and she and Robert brought the best recipe ever! It was so fun having all of the Stephens family down too! 

It really was the best cookie day. It was sad when we had to take mom back before she turned into a pumpkin but PRAYING we can bring her home for good very soon. Can't wait. 

Polar express, year 2~

After having such a great time last year, we were excited to head up to the Polar express again this year at the Cuyahoga Valley Scenic roadway. 

The trip up there is always rough but always so worth it when we finally get to the train. The girls wore their jammies after we picked them up from school and PreK so they at least were cozy. As we got closer and more excited, it even started to SNOW which was amazing!

The ride was great--as always. We missed our friend Saphira--they got stuck in traffic and didn't make it, but we still had fun. Singing, hearing the polar express story read, games, cocoa, snacks, it's the best!

And the highlight of the ride, possibly the ticket getting punched on the ride, like the movie and getting the bell from Santa for believing. 

it always reminds me how very lucky we are to have the magic of christmas and makes me scared as heck for when they lose it. For now though, i'm going to drink it all in one more year!

Amara dance preview

Reflections doesn't allow parents to watch any old time they want, they have "preview" nights where parents get to watch through one-way glass at the kids. Amara is in tap and ballet (she was in hip hop and lyrical too but dropped those) so i got to go and watch 2 sessions of her classes. 

She clearly loves tap. a lot--she likes ballet too and does well in there, but i think she likes tap more :) she likes to dress up for ballet though, which is great--

It was fun to get to peak in on them and we should find out their song and costumes soon so she is thrilled about that. Recital is in May at the end of the year and i can't wait to see her perform!

pampered and pushed

Rehab is for all things. Physical, mental, spiritial. But because mom has some down time and alone time, I wanted to try to make things pleasurable for her too. 

Steph, was SO generous to offer to come up and cut mom's hair--just a trim, and to re-do her gel nails for her. Being at the James she's not had much beauty time, so we wanted to make this special. As an added bonus, a PT therapist came in for a massage too!

During the day mom works hard, she's giving it her all in PT and I couldn't be prouder of her--that's why we have to keep this all going. A little pampering, but getting it done in the day too!

doggies at peace

"At peace," is kind of a joke--because they really never are. They are always at each other. Whether it's across the room or sharing water, they are TRULY like to siblings. Ily does NOT like Ollie close to us at all. She gives him what we call her "old lady growl" and warns him off...

Though as Oliver has gotten bigger and faster, he can now catch Ily most of the time. He still tries to get her attention most of the time or at the very least follow her lead, whether she wants him to or not. They are great kids and we love them both, but you really do have to keep your eyes on them!

first grade and Pre school pics

Amara's first grade pic...awww...kind of doesn't even look like her, huh? Dress from Hanna Anderson and this super cute necklace that was promptly misplaced...lol.

Cora's preK pic from The Naz, or GCCCC...last "pre school" pic for the records.

I'm so super blessed and lucky to have these doll babies!